Goodbye 2012

I can hardly believe that it is December 31, 2012. The end of one crazy year!
It has been 170 days since Our Adventure began. It has flown by and crawled at the pace of a snail all at once, if that even makes sense.
A more beautiful day could not have been offered for the beginning of our journey. We had breakfast together and then began focusing on our individual "priorities" for the day. Kirk had found a weight lifting set in the classifieds and had made the purchase and the pick up before 10:00 AM. He loaded "Inga" the dirt bike, on the trailer and went to pick up our favorite son-in-law Steven and nephew, Kenny, who would be joining him on his third ride of the week.

Third ride of the week?!?! Has this man no job? Responsibilities? A wife with a Honey-Do list?

Yes. Yes. And, yes.

This is the life of a Firefighter. When the opportunity for Kirk to transfer back to the Fire/Paramedic side at the Orem Department of Public Safety, it almost seemed like an answer to prayers for this motorcycle riding man. Firefighters work a grueling 48 hours on duty and then enjoy 96 hours off duty. It is not a schedule for the normal man. ;)  The Brethren refer to each 48 hours on as a "Tour of Duty". Kirk had just transferred back at the end of June and had served three tours before Our Adventure began.

Back at home I was making preparations for an early birthday dinner for Steven including his favorite dessert, lemon meringue pie, which turned out pretty great, if I do say so myself. ;)



I had just tidied everything up when the phone rang. It was Steven. "Kirk has been in a motorcycle crash but he is okay." His voice was so calm that I thought he was just teasing. "You are so funny" I said, "What time will you guys be home for dinner?" He repeated what he had said the first time and added, "They life-flighted him to Utah Valley and he should be there by now." I told him I would head right over. I was trying to digest three key points from the phone call; crash, life-flight and he's okay.

I immediately knelt down and prayed with all of my heart, "Please Heavenly Father, please let him be okay." I felt an overwhelming sense of peace; everything would be fine. I held on to that moment with an ever tightening grip that almost became a strangle hold over the next few days. I even started to doubt the feeling. Did I just make this up in my head. Did I really get an answer to my prayer? I think this is human nature. We ask for Heavenly Father's help and then doubt the blessing we have been given. Why do we do this? Wouldn't our lives be so much easier if we just believed?

Over the next few days we were granted a miracle. Millions of miracles! The word "Miracle" became our new mantra. Again, doubt would creep in and make me question the blessings..... "Are we worthy of these miracles?" The answer? Heavenly Father thinks so.

Over the next 170 days we have watched our life become rich with blessings. We are even closer as husband and wife. Our girls, Bryn and Dani and her husband Steven, have given up so many of their own lives to be available at any moment.






We have enjoyed the support, love, prayers and service from family, friends, co-workers, neighbors and our ward family. They carried so much of the load for us that we almost felt weightless. I never realized what my actions, bringing a meal to a neighbor, running errands for another or praying for them during their time of need would do for them. It literally "lightens their load". Another revelation for us both was that we could "feel" the prayers that were offered for us. I don't even know if there are words to describe this. I do know that I will forever be grateful for those prayers.



We are optimistically looking forward to our January 22nd meeting with Starlene Clayson NP at Dr. Gardner's office. We anticipate a clean bill of health and a 100% clearance to return to work with the Brethren at the Fire Station. It will be a celebration of epic proportions!




We leave you at the end of 2012 with this:

The memories of our Adventure filled year
Are full of miracles we'll always hold dear.
Millions of lessons and blessings galore
With all of this, who could ask for more?
But more we were given, much more we received
Our greatest lesson was just to Believe.
Believe in miracles, great and small,
Believe in the love God gives us all.
Believe in the goodness of family and friends
Whose service and prayers seem to have no end.
Believe in this truth, that God has a plan
And He'll help you through if you'll just take His hand.
He'll love you and guide you and help you to grow
He'll be right beside you, of this we know.
So through this Season, with all you receive,
We hope that you will always Believe.

May 2013 bring you copious amounts of happiness and blessings! You are worth it!

Love to you all!
- Posted by Gena Bertelsen using BlogPress from my iPad

Conversation Piece

Another week has passed in Our Adventure.

Today is the 80th day since it all began. Whew! Kirk says it definitely feels like it has been that long. I think you might get a different perspective whilst wearing a turtle shell back brace.

He has been back to work, light-duty, for 3 weeks now and comes home each evening totally exhausted and ready to crawl in bed. Considering the alternative.....exhausted is absolutely exceptional.

We had a great day yesterday. We had originally planned to take a ride up the canyon and see the beautiful fall leaves up close. But, as I was reaching for my shoes my dog Buddy nudged his way into my closet as if to show me which shoes I should pick. They were the walking shoes. Putting those shoes on makes him the happiest dog in the world as he knows he will get to join me for a walk. He became very vocal as I picked up the walking shoes and I told Kirk that Buddy was hoping we would go for a walk instead. He got his way. And it was perfect.

We went about two miles, just North of our neighborhood, and roused just about every dog you could imagine into a barking frenzy. It was not our normal route so these dogs are not as familiar with Buddy the Wonder Dog and his gentle, playful nature. It is either that or they are extremely jealous of his doggy backpack that he wears on our walks.


Buddy is quite an amazing dog. He is a shoe and furniture critic. He creates enough hair in one week to make another dog and, he loves everyone. Buddy is such an obedient dog that he stays right with us when we walk as if he were the poster dog for the "We don't need no stinkin' leashes" brand. No leash, just a happy friendly dog that wants to meet everyone. This last trait is not always welcomed by others. In fact, most people Buddy would meet on our walks would initially be afraid of him. He is very unique looking and if you didn't know him, you might wonder about his level of friendliness. I decided to use him in an experiment; what if I changed everyones perception of him? Would people still be afraid?

We took him to PetSmart and purchased a doggy backpack. Upon returning home, Bryn and I put it on him and took him for a short walk. He acted as though he had been punished and walked with his ears back and with a little droop in his tail. I didn't give up. I started putting it on him for every walk so that it would become routine. Almost immediately people changed. Everyone wanted to pet him. All that changed was their perception! He had this backpack on which made him appear to be a "working" dog and everyone knows that working dogs are friendly! And, working dogs want to visit and be touched. Buddy cannot believe his good fortune.


Kirk's turtle shell has become a lot like Buddy's backpack. Wherever we go, people want to talk to him, ask him what happened or, as in an earlier post, ask if it can stop a bullet:) We ventured in to several pawn shops yesterday and met so many people that seemed to have so much in common with us. Whether they lived in Mapleton, rode motorcycles or had back problems, we were connected. Kirk and I were talking about how his shell is like a people magnet and he said it has opened up so many conversations with people he didn't even know. He calls it a "Conversation Piece", you know, like one of those great big twisted pieces of glass that you use as a decoration and people are drawn to ask questions about it. It starts a conversation. That is another blessing of Our Adventure.


Saturdays have become our "let's just be together" day. Our old "normal" would have seen weekends come and go with most of our time spent separately, focused on whatever we each made a priority. I was worried about laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning and Kirk was more "fun" oriented with motorcycle riding or tinkering on guns when he was not at work. The new "normal" includes plenty of focus on each other. Priorities have been balanced where they should have been all along.


There are so many ways, in the busy life that we all lead, to lose focus on the important things and we are living proof of that. I think you become so comfortable in your relationships that you don't think about the nurturing that is needed to keep that relationship strong. It's like planting a garden; you work the soil, plant the seed, fertilize and water, prune and weed, and if you are diligent, you reap a wonderful harvest. If you only planted the seed and watered when it was convenient or when you remembered to, your harvest would be nothing to brag about, if you even had a harvest.

Our Adventure has taught us to make each other and our family our number one priority. No matter what. I used to think our marriage was great and couldn't really imagine it being any better. Our Adventure has only improved our relationship because of the adjustments we needed to make. Again, another blessing.

Hope your priorities are balanced. If not.....do something about it! Life is too short to waste another minute!



- Posted by Gena Bertelsen using BlogPress from my iPad

Tomorrow

"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life.
It comes to us at midnight very clean.
It is perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands.
It hopes that we have learned something from yesterday."
~John Wayne

Today is the 69th day since Our Adventure began.

Kirk has been plugging away, putting in lots of hours of light-duty work at Orem City. His spirits are lifted so much by The Brethren. They probably don't even know how loved they are.....in a professional way, of course:)

He stayed home from work today not because he wanted to, but because his body told him it would not be in a standing position for more than a few minutes at a time. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Our sweet Bryn shared the quote at the beginning of the post. When I read it I immediately knew it was meant for me today. Do you ever have moments like that?

Let's just say...."It's been a day." Whew...I feel much better:)

So many times I get caught up in the moments of today, stress, smiles, happiness and frustration, and I let it set the tone for the rest of the day. I realize that this is not very productive, but that does not lessen the "attractiveness" of letting emotions take the proverbial wheel and drive you wherever it may. Unfortunately, emotions rarely take you to your planned "destination".

Our Adventure has opened up a treasure chest of emotions for our entire family. We have laughed, cried, worried, been hopeful, anxious, grateful, joyful and elated. Actually, where haven't our emotions been?

Emotions are tricky little things that have much more control of our actions and words than any of us would be willing to admit. (There's that "control" word again.....why does it always seem to be in the shadows just waiting to jump out and do something crazy?)

So, today is almost over. Tomorrow is going to be beautiful. We all have another 24 hours to smile, serve, pray, help, guide and inspire. And after that, we will get another 24 hours to improve on everything again.


I am looking forward to midnight. In fact, I may just stay up to welcome tomorrow with open arms.



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8 Weeks Ago Today

Can you believe it has been eight weeks since Our Adventure began?

Sometimes it seems like years ago. Other times it feels like it was just yesterday.

We started today early by walking at the 8th Annual Suicide Prevention Walk in Provo. The theme was HOPE; Hold On. Persuade. Empower. It was good to spend our morning supporting some very special people in our lives and we are so grateful for the memories of those we have lost.

The walk was two miles and the route was one big square of several city blocks. At each corner stood a silent sign holder sharing a powerful message. I especially loved this one:




The majority of us have seen or heard the words of the Serenity Prayer throughout our lives but today they seemed to shout out to me "Hey You! Pay attention!"

In my mind, the Serenity Prayer has been a type of mantra for Alcoholics Anonymous, a poetic reminder that Heavenly Father has a plan, whether we like it or not. We cannot tell Him what to do, we just need to pay attention to the promptings of what He needs us to do.

For some reason, I have struggled with this in the last two months. But I am being reminded daily that I am not in charge. It's a bittersweet kind of thing:)

I am thinking of starting a new support group for people who think they can fix everything by themselves and in the process they create a whole new series of problems. I know I have mentioned Control Freaks Anonymous before but my BFF Cheryl said it's not actually "Anonymous" if you openly admit it.

This seems to present another problem........

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He's Back!!

He did it! He even made it the whole day! Thank you to everyone for your thoughts and prayers throughout Our Adventure. We absolutely could not have gotten to this point without you.

Thank you City of Orem Police, Fire, Paramedics, Dispatchers, Office Staff. You have made the rough road smoother.

Thank you to all of our sweet family, friends and neighbors. It would be impossible to name everyone as we have been so blessed by so many.

Our biggest THANK YOU to our Father in Heaven who truly knows what we need and when we need it.

How blessed are we?

How blessed are we all?

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Happy Birthday Dani Lou!

It has been a good day. Day 49 of Our Adventure.

Kirk has been sore the last few days and as you can imagine, this does not work into his instant recovery very well.  We are one week away from returning to work light-duty and he is really pushing himself to be able to be sitting/standing/walking for more than a few hours at a time.  He will get there, and if you ask me, I think he is doing fabulous!!

 Today is Dani's (our oldest daughter) birthday and we celebrated with her favorite meal of Gnocchi.  For those of you who did not have the pleasure of having an Italian Nonna (grandmother) who taught you some of those amazing old-world recipes....I am truly sorry.  You have really missed out.  Please enjoy the actual aerial view of her Gnocchi, fresh green beans and squash, homemade rolls and homemade apple pie.....













Trust me...it was REALLY good.



She is worth it.  We are so blessed to be her parents.  She is a wonderful daughter, sister, wife, grand-daughter and friend.  We are constantly in awe of her compassion, goodness, intelligence and beauty.  If we are one tenth of what she is...we count ourselves pretty darn lucky.

Dani, Bryn and Kirk at the 2012 Orem City Firefighter's 5K.

Happy Birthday Dani Lou!!!

Adaptable

"Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time" ~Leo Buscuglia

We have been making our way through the uncharted territory of Our Adventure for 46 days. Some days are like being in a deep fog of the unknowing but most days our path seems brilliantly clear.

Kirk is improving every day in strength, endurance and, if possible, hope.

He is still pushing some limits but seems to have accepted the "Marathon Mentality" in most of his activities. His main focus right now is increasing the amount of time he is out of bed, walking, sitting and standing. Since the doctor told him that he could be released for light duty on September 10th, it is all he can think of....getting back to the Brotherhood at Orem City.

The last week has been bursting with blessings and sprinkled with reminders of all that Kirk normally does for me and our family. It is a powerful testimony of "You don't know what you have until it is gone".

For years, Kirk has been the family "repairman" fixing everything from air conditioners, toilets, cars and yard tools. This is a natural talent he has that was noticed and nurtured from a young age by his dad and his grandpa Williams. Dad and Grandpa would be working on a motor of some kind and would have Kirk hold the light or hand them tools. At that time it may have seemed like a chore but he has been blessed with the experiences and knowledge throughout his life.



This blessing came full circle this week as he taught Bryn how to change the brakes on her car. He talked her through each step, handed her tools and shared generations of knowledge with her. Normally, Kirk would have completed this task on his own. Quickly, efficiently and effortlessly.

Bryn was so proud of herself, and so were we. She is a generally amazing girl that has an uncanny knack of making everything look easy. She said that the first wheel took over an hour to complete but the second one took only thirty minutes. I can honestly say that I do not personally know any other woman that has changed the brakes on her car. Impressive:)

This week has reminded me that adventure requires adaptation. I often think of a neighbor boy that just wanted to hang out with Bryn. She wasn't always excited about the idea of spending her day with a boy and would come up with suggestions of activities she was sure he would reject. He was willing to accept anything she threw at him, just to have a friend to play with. One time, she pulled out the big guns and told him, "I really just want to play Barbies today." His quick response left her speechless, "Great! I'll be Ken." From that time forth we referred to him as "Mr. Adaptable."

It is amazing the things we can learn in life if we are just willing to be adaptable.
Love to you all.



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Miracles All Around

It's been a few days since the last post and tonight I find I have a few minutes to give a little update.

It is day 45 since the Adventure began.

Actually, since OUR Adventure began.

We have had perma-grins on our faces since last Wednesday when we received the most beautiful news that Kirk would be released for light-duty on September 10th and an anticipated full release on January 14th of next year. It truly is a miracle.

I was visiting with a lovely friend I have met through work today and relating the details of Our Adventure and the miracles we have been blessed with. As we talked about attitudes and trials and lessons learned, a very powerful thought came to my mind: We witness miracles everyday but only seem to openly recognize them when in a crisis situation. Why is that?

I want to change that in my life. I want to be openly grateful for everything. For good times and bad. For busy days and restful evenings. For love, family, friends and even for friendships that have ended. I want to recognize the miracle of forgiveness, of healing and of the atonement. I want to be aware of the miracle of life, including my own. Every breath is a miracle. I need to make the most of even every breath.

Unfortunately, we get so caught up in "life" that we miss the miracles in every moment. How did we get here? And is there a map to get back?

I've decided I will set a specific time aside each day to focus on the every day miracles, vocalize them, write them down. They will eventually become the way I look at life and the things I focus on. It's my little way of taking some of that control back in my life. (A shout out to my fellow control freaks;))

So today, I would like to tell you about a couple of miracles in my day....
1. It is a miracle that I have not killed Kirk through my medication mis-management as he found an error in my preparation of pills for him today. Just last night, while filling all of the meds I thought to myself, "Dang, I'm getting good at this."

2. It is a miracle that Kirk is able to notice my mis-management of pills and correct it and that he can now choose to manage his own medications. :)

3. Our girls, Bryn and Dani, and son-in-law Steven, are miracles. They continue to take care of things for us without even thinking about it. Dani said today, "That's what we do. We haven't done anything out of the ordinary." What she is forgetting is that every minute she or Steven or Bryn spends taking care of things for us is a minute of their time they are not taking care of their own things. We are grateful.

4. Our family and friends are miracles. They have been there for every thing we need and more. We honestly don't know how we will repay them. It will take a few more miracles.....but we believe in miracles.

Love to you all!



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Kate, Wes and the Four C's

Day 40.

6 week mark since the beginning of the Adventure.

Kate Jordan, one of Bryn's best friends and a girl we choose to call one of our own, got married today to Wes Jacobsen. It was beautiful and I am so glad we were able to be there to witness that once in a lifetime moment with them and their family and friends.

We had a very low key day again today as Kirk was still so sore from Thursday's exertion. He knew he would need his energy to be able to be at Kate and Wes's wedding.



Shortly after the ceremony started I looked over at Kirk and asked him if he was okay. He showed me his shirt sleeve that was starting to soak through with sweat, at his wrists! Wearing his turtle shell is like walking around in a mini sauna. By the time we got home and he removed his shell, his shirt was soaked. I think he would tell you it was totally worth it.

The ceremony was officiated by Rod Oldroyd and he drew everyone's attention to four words that they would hear in the actual marriage ceremony; Choose, Companion, Cleave and Cherish. They were choosing each other as their Companion and they should Cleave to each other and Cherish each other. Beautiful words that should be remembered every day.

I snapped a few pictures of the wedding and wanted to share them with you.





























We were also blessed by Danielle, Whitney and Kate Carly and their "Girl's Day" cinnamon rolls and sugar cookies. I think Danielle is trying to fatten us up! We're okay with that....this was her best batch yet;)





Hope you all had a wonderful Saturday too!
















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Bert's Birthday

Day 36 of the Adventure and we are thrilled to be celebrating Kirk's birthday. He won't be getting the senior citizen discount anytime soon but he is officially one year older.

I thought I would just post some pics from our last 36 days to remind you why we are so thrilled. He has come so far!






























































Kirk got to hang out with his dad and Bryn while I was at work.
Then Dani and Steven came over and joined us for take-out dinner from La Casita, one of Kirk's favorite places.


Brad and Darlene,, Mom and Dad, Peg, Rick, Lori and Cole and Matt dropped in with well wishes and goodies.








Thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers! We wouldn't be here without them;)
Love you all!





























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Are You Prepared?

35 days since the beginning of our Adventure. Each day, each hour, each minute, is one more gift we have been given. Some of those gifts are wrapped up beautifully with nice big bows. Some have been disguised as difficulties and pain. Nevertheless, they are all gifts.

After our fun-filled, fast-paced day yesterday we were both physically and mentally exhausted today. So glad it was Sunday, a much slower-paced day.





Jim and Danielle stopped by yesterday after running the Hobble Creek Half Marathon. I love this picture of them, full of energy, vitality, happiness. The perfect description of them. Kirk asked Jim what it was like to run the half marathon and his response was powerful, "It's like everything in life. If you are prepared, it's great. If not, it sucks." Jim and Danielle have been preparing for this run for several months and it seems to have paid off.

This is the second time in as many days that being prepared has been discussed. I had a late lunch with Cheryl on Friday and we talked about her efforts of updating her Emergency 72 hour kit. She is doing everything she can to be prepared in the event of an emergency. That's Cheryl on the left, me on the right. We have had many discussions about being prepared over the last almost 20 years of friendship.



Kirk and I have always been into "preparedness" whether it is food storage, camping equipment, road trips. It is one of those things that I could talk about, think about and plan out for hours. Typing this post has made me dissect my passion of being prepared. Bottom line....it is a control issue. I am starting to feel like this is Control Freaks Anonymous....and, in case you were wondering...I am the president.

One thing we were never prepared for is our Adventure. We were not prepared for the outpouring of love, support, prayers and service of our family, friends and neighbors. We could have never imagined being prepared for the mental and physical toll this could take on each of us. How do you prepare for these things?

We are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and in a book of scripture known as The Doctrine and Covenants is a verse that says, "If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear." (D&C 38:30). I have hung on to this verse as a guiding light in my life. When something worried me, I would figure out what I needed to do to be prepared and do it. This works for many of life's trials and experiences. Just like Jim said, "If you are prepared, it's great. If not, it sucks."

We may not have prepared specifically for the Adventure but we see that the steps we have made, for what we thought were other reasons, have blessed us. We have been blessed by the preparations and actions of so many others that, when added to our efforts, the picture becomes much clearer, much more doable, much more beautiful.

As we thank our Father in Heaven each day in the last 35 for the blessings we have been given, we always start by thanking Him for our Adventure. We have learned so much about ourselves, each other, our family, friends and neighbors that we would not have had the opportunity to learn in any other way.

We have learned that we did something right in our parenting efforts by seeing the way our kids have supported us through their service and love. That alone makes the Adventure worth it! Who would have thought that teaching your kids to serve others would have been part of the preparation for an Adventure such as ours?

We have learned that we still have a lot to learn and a lot to prepare for. I guess if you are not preparing for something, you might not actually be living. And, everything you do is a preparation for something in your life. Be prepared and it will be great!!!

Love you all!



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Bullet Proof

Whew..... I cannot believe that it is only 8:30 PM. It has been a long, fun-filled 34th day of our Adventure.
As I got everything ready for bed last night, Kirk told me he wanted me to sleep in today. "Don't come in to give me my pills, just sleep in, I'll be fine." As the 6:00 AM alarm went off on our phones to remind us about taking medication, I stayed in my bed and listened intently to hear the unmistakable sound of the lid being removed from the pill container. He had taken his meds and I drifted back to sleep. I woke up about 7:30 and cuddled with the dogs, making myself stay in the bed and not wake him up. The 8:00 AM alarm went off and again, I heard him take his meds. Our walkie-talkies didn't work last night so I texted him a message at 8:01 AM saying, "I'm going to stay in bed just a bit longer." He didn't respond and everything was so quiet coming from his room that I thought he must have gone back to sleep. About 8:15 I peeked into his room to check on him. As soon as he saw me he said, "I can't believe you would abandon me in my hour of need!" Now....if you don't know Kirk/Bert very well....this is said with the perfect amount of humor, timing and a sly little grin. He hadn't seen my text and was waiting to toss out his one-liner the minute he saw me. It was a beautiful, fun way to start our Saturday together.

Dr. Gardner had told us, when Kirk was released from the hospital, that he didn't want Kirk riding around in the car because being in a car wreck could really toss a wrench into the healing process. It is my belief that Dr. Gardner had no idea how good my driving record has been and was merely concerned about the skill of the OTHER drivers on the road. I have bent this rule a tiny, tiny bit. I have taken Kirk every Saturday morning to the local Gas-N-Go that our dear friend and neighbor, Chris Frampton, owns. Kirk gets a drink, visits with Chris for a minute and gets time out of "jail".
This morning, in a moment of sheer kindness I asked Kirk, "Would you like to drive?" I was unprepared for his quick response, "Yes!" That was it. I was locked in. I couldn't say, "Just kidding!" without some serious back-peddling. So, I went along for the ride....so to speak.




Today marks 5 weeks since the Adventure began and 5 weeks since Kirk has operated a motor vehicle. He did wonderfully! Of course, this went straight to his head and he got all cocky with me for the rest of the day. Kind of brave for a guy who is worried about me being there in his "time of need";)

Even with the weight loss and the back brace on, Kirk can still look pretty intimidating when he walks into a room. As we walked into Gas-N-Go a gentleman was walking out, took a long look at Kirk and asked, "Is that thing bullet proof?" I am sure it was hard for Kirk to answer without laughing, "It's a back brace. I broke my back." I think the Junior Police Officer sticker badge can fool a lot of people. I know it worked for me in several instances during my youth.

Our day continued with visits from friends, family and neighbors. It is mind boggling to see how many people Kirk has had an effect on through his life, that continue to love, serve and pray for his complete recovery. We have been so blessed and so humbled by the wonderful examples we have in our life.

Kirk had his second PUSH Therapy appointment with Jennifer Tippetts. Two days after his first appointment with her he was so sick and so sore that he said he wasn't sure he wanted to do that again. He is glad that he did, it was much less painful this time as his muscles are healing and getting stronger.








We ended the day at Rick and Lori's for our first "outing" including a great dinner of BBQ burgers and dogs and some seriously delicious sweet potato fries. I even let Kirk drive again! Okay, I didn't actually "let" him, he has taken the rover keys, hung them in his room where he can "keep his eye on them" and revoked my driving privileges in "his" car.

With his new-found cockiness he is going to wish that shell was bullet proof!

Truth be told, this is the guy I love! I have missed his teasing and fun sense of humor. I know he is getting better just by listening to him tease all of us. Welcome back sweetheart.

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Sharing

It is day 32 and I would first like to apologize for no post yesterday. I asked Kirk last night what he would like to talk about on the blog and he said he felt like it was "a non-blog worthy day." So I put the Ipad away and we enjoyed a quiet evening together. It was a nice break after a long day.




Interestingly enough, both Dani and Bryn were here tonight for dinner and I asked them and Kirk what we should talk about on the blog tonight. They each rattled off some thoughts but followed them up with "We've talked about all of those things before. Life is getting back to normal and people aren't going to keep reading the blog."
I disagree.
And....in our family.....whatever Mom says, goes. Okay, maybe not, but it was worth a try;)
Just for the record.....I still disagree.
We have received countless comments, through email, facebook, the blog and personal conversations, about our Adventure and the positive way we are facing it. While we believe there is no other way to handle this situation, we are finding that this attitude is unique in society. I hope we can help others see a better way through sharing our experience.




We have some wonderful friends at the Payson Senior Center and love listening to their stories about life and learning. Through my work with Freedom Home Health and Hospice and other healthcare companies, I have been hanging out with these wonderful people for more than seven lucky years and have brought Kirk along with me to some of the activities I've attended. Not surprisingly, everyone loved him the moment they met him. He just has a gift for getting along with anyone. We have enjoyed going to different restaurants, cooking dutch oven dinners for them and even taking pictures of them at the annual Christmas party. Our lives have truly been blessed by our association and friendship with them.
Tammy Evans is the Assistant Director of the center and I will never forget a lesson she taught me one day. She had me hold a cup of water in my hand, arm stretched out, and she asked me how much I thought it weighed. I told her eight ounces. She asked me to continue to hold it there while she kept talking to me. After about 30 seconds she asked me again how much I thought it weighed. I told her I thought it still weighed eight ounces. She continued to talk for a couple of minutes while I held the cup out. She asked again, "How much does that weigh?" It actually felt heavier. I knew it hadn't changed, but my arm was getting tired and that made it feel heavier.
The lesson here? Holding that cup of water out seemed pretty easy at first but not ever having a break, either setting the cup down or even drinking some of the water, tired out my arm. This can be applied to any difficulties in life. If you don't set the burden, the worry, the stress down for a while, it will wear you out. It will seem to be much more than it actually is and much harder to deal with.
Having someone to share the Adventure with, Kirk, the girls, Our family and friends has helped lighten the load. Whether it is a phone call from Cheryl, a meal from the neighbors, a visit from a friend, Steven mowing the lawn, Dani bringing our granddog Hank up to visit or Bryn running our errands.....this list could go on and on..... Each and every effort helps lighten the load, gives a break to Kirk or me and brings so many blessings to our life.
I don't know if I ever realized how important these things can be for those on the receiving end. It is always easier to give than to receive and I'll bet that everyone reading this would be the first person volunteering to help someone in need. But, just as Karen Murray, Relief Society president in our marvelous Mapleton 21st ward told me, "Don't take the blessing of giving away from others."
Thank you to every one who has joined us on the Adventure. We will continue to share, maybe not everyday, but as often as we can, and we hope it can help someone in their life. We love you!!
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Shadows

Day 30. Wow! Can you believe it? I sometimes still have to pinch myself to make sure it's real.

Kirk got a "Get Out of Jail Free" card today (he calls being stuck in bed Jail) and was able to take a drive to Northwest Orthotics to have his turtle shell resized. He has lost so much weight that it is not supporting him like it should. I called this morning thinking they would just come to the house in the next few days but they wanted him to come in today!








We have been working with Russ since the night of the accident and he has been wonderful to continue altering the shell so that it fits Kirk perfectly. Thank you, Thank you Russ!












The entire outing took almost an hour and a half and Kirk seemed pretty happy about getting back to his "cell". I even left him alone for a couple of hours (gasp!!) and he lived through it! Good thing that Bryn stopped in to check on him and I am sure she rescued him from certain death.


While Kirk and I were driving back from Provo we were next to a pest control truck that had a picture of a large spider with an even larger shadow. The thought crossed my mind and quickly came out my mouth, "I think the reason people are afraid of spiders is because their shadows are  so big." Kirk chuckled and politely agreed.




As I have continued bustling about today I kept thinking about that spider shadow. Shadows are scary! Think of the most terrifying movie you have seen. Right before the scariest part you hear the heart pumping music, there is major darkness and then......a shadow. I read once that FEAR is an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real. That is a shadow!
Our Adventure has had some shadows. Little shadows. Big shadows. The biggest one is the shadow of the future. We have made so many plans, just like you have, but we really don't know what our future will bring until a little more light appears on the scene. We know this will just take time. That doesn't make it any less scary, but we can handle it. Something about an Adventure.......it is full of excitement!!
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My Gladiator

Day 27. It's been a good day. Wait...every day is a good day. Yes, some are better than others, but they are all good. He gets a little bit better every day. His pain still fluctuates and he is going a little stir-crazy but that is all to be expected.

I got home from work this afternoon and Kirk and Bryn were watching a movie called Gladiator.


Not sure if any of you have seen it, it's pretty violent, not my type of movie at all. However, watching Maximus, the main guy (wish I could tell you the actor's name, but, I'm not really a movie person), as he battled in the Coliseum wearing his armor, I saw Kirk. Powerful, strong, determined, focused, handsome. If Maximus had a choice, I think he would have chosen digital camo for his armor too;).



Kirk and I have been married for more than 25 years, blissful years. Kirk says it's 23 plus two years. I will agree that every single moment hasn't been perfect. There have been some disagreements here and there but I do not think they add up to two years. Besides, he went to school in Springville and I am not entirely sure that his mathematic skills are what they should be (sorry Red Devil friends).

Some of our highlights: Dani, Bryn, Steven, Maizy, Sadie, Mr. Bunny, Nikita, Oliver, Laska, Ebeneezer, Jasper, Spike 1 and Spike 2, Hitler the cat, Jazz, Crazy, Buddy, Gidget, Macaroni, several fish, Tweety, Makai, The Non'ts, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends, Family, 9 different moves, mostly on a national holiday, Bertelsen parties, camping, 4 wheeling, at least 27 different vehicles, countless motorcycles, sleep overs in our room, firetrucks, police cars, boating, Christmas Eve jammies, jumping on the trampoline, stick ponies, birthday surprises, laughing, crying, laughing some more.

I have a perma-grin right now just thinking about the girls at different times in their lives. They both have such a strong bond with Kirk, and with me, but they are definitely their "daddy's girls". They have pony-tailed his hair (when he had some), painted his nails and played lego for hours on the floor. He has taught them to ride a bike, drive a four-wheeler, drive a car, even fix a rear differential on a 66 Chevy truck. They have gone boating, camping, riding and shooting with their dad. He has given one "away" only to gain a son and friend. He has guided, grounded and given so much to these two. And they continue to give back. Don't you love it when kids learn good things from you? He is their hero, and mine. He is our Gladiator

Looking back on this list of beautiful moments in the last quarter of a century has altered my description of our life together. Yes, they have been blissful, but maybe Kirk is a little closer on the accuracy of it all. It is 23 years plus 2 years of a little bit better every day.






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Rare

I am having one of the most relaxing evenings I have had in almost a month. Today is day 26 of the adventure. Kirk is drifting in and out of sleep. I know this because his body twitches, then he snores very softly and it grows louder and LOUDER until it wakes him up. Then we start all over again. It is a beautiful sight and sound. How glad I am that I can hear him and see him.

The kids came over tonight, after being here most of the day, and cooked a delicious dinner of BBQ pork roast, grilled veggies and toasted garlic bread. Kirk had seconds! So, so rare anymore. Okay, most of us had seconds! It was THAT good! Thank you so much Steven, Dani and Bryn!


Kirk had his last therapy visit today. He will start again when he gets to stand without the turtle shell, a couple of months away from now. I just want to thank Brad Bennett for being a fabulous Physical Therapist, enduring our dogs and being such an encouragement to Kirk. He has taken the time to not only do his job but to get to know us. What a rarity in our society. When he arrived today Buddy started squeaking in happiness. That is also rare.




In fact.....much of what we have experienced in the last 26 days would be considered rare. My ADD brain has started pinging around on rare things and I thought of perfect scores in the Olympics, winning the lottery and even diamonds.

How do these things apply to our adventure? Easy....we are going for that rare, perfect score. Having Kirk here, is even better than winning the lottery (I think;)). And a diamond, the hardest substance known to man, starts out as a lump of coal and with incredible amounts of pressure and heat it becomes one of the most sought after, beautiful treasures.

As we continue through our adventure there is sure to be pressure-a-plenty and enough heat to make us boil but it will end up beautiful. We will become better, we will be stronger and we will shine!

Love to you all!
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Choices

We have been blessed with two thoughtful, compassionate, giving daughters and, as a bonus, we have also acquired one amazing son-in-law. As many in the family have said, Dani sure set the bar high when she agreed to marry Steven. Some day, we fully expect to have another son-in-law that will challenge Steven's "favorite Son-In-Law" status;).







Throughout Dani and Bryn's lives we have tried to instill the very simple fact that "Attitude is Everything". It is really that easy.

25 days since the adventure began and almost every visitor to our home, on the phone, in comments on the blog and facebook, talks about how positive we have been through this whole journey. What we hope everyone realizes is that it is a choice, a very conscious effort, to make the best of everything.

It can be so easy to be consumed by the negativity in everyday life. How many times have you checked facebook to see what was going on with your friends to find a bunch of comments relaying to the world how bad their day was, how unhappy they are or how much they hate their job? It is not only consuming, it is contagious!!

In EVERY situation in life, you have two choices: You can make the best of it or you can make the worst of it. It's your choice.

This philosophy is the core of our beliefs and guides the actions in our lives. It also gives great comfort to control freaks, such as myself. No matter what the situation, no matter what someone else says or does to hurt you, you can CHOOSE to make the best of it by controlling YOUR thoughts, words and actions and only sharing the positive ones.

Just so you know, our adventure is no cake walk. It is probably more emotionally draining than anything else. Kirk made the comment to one of our neighbors today that he used to think it would be great if all he had to do was lay in bed and watch TV. After 25 days in bed and only 20 minutes of standing/sitting/walking at a time, he has changed his mind. He has been in pain, achy, frustrated, tired and even helpless at times. Would you know it if you stopped by or called? Probably not. Why? He has chosen to make the best of it and that is what he will share.

We both want to thank you for the continued prayers for Kirk, his healing and our family. Thank you for the service you continue to give and the thoughtful words you share. This all helps us to persevere, to make the best of the adventure and to learn the most that we can so that some day we can help lighten someone else's load.
Love to you all!!


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Moments

Life is so amazing when you stand back, take a breath and focus on the precise moment you are in. How many times today have you focused on any one moment? Have there been moments today that should have been savored but in the bustle of life they passed by with hardly a thought? Let me share a couple of ours.......


Day 20. Date night. We decided to stay in tonight:) Glad we did or we would have missed some great company.

The first picture is of one of the many girls we claim as our own, Dani Brady, and her boys Jack and Nick. Dani has been in our life for about 15 years and has been one of our Dani's best friends. The dogs were so glad to have them here and the boys were totally mesmerized by Kirk and his "crash video".


This last picture is an older one of Jim and Danielle Carly and their adorable kids (L-R) Eli, Kate, Porter and Whitney. Jim is actually our cousin but we refer to him as a brother and the kids call them Aunt and Uncle when introducing them to anyone. Kirk and I look up to them (even though they are slightly younger, okay...and maybe shorter....) in so many ways and feel so blessed to have them in our lives.
Jim and Danielle came over tonight and Jim installed a remote control on the fan in the bedroom for Kirk. Something so simple for Jim but that will make such a difference for Kirk on a daily basis.
I hope you don't get tired of me telling you how utterly amazing our daughters are. I don't know that a day has passed in the last 20 that they have not been right here, wherever here is at the time, to support and care for Kirk and me. Dani and Bryn are the two best things that have ever happened to us.
We have blessings like this every day. Again, a small amount of time out of their lives makes such a difference in ours. I brought Chinese food home for our date night. Here's a picture of my fortune:



May you be just as blessed:)